My mental, emotional and creative health is wavy at times. Following World Mental Health Day earlier this month, I’ve been thinking about the other blocks and barriers that can get in the way of being an artist. I suppose learning to surf the waves is my best bet, seeing as life (like art) is not straightforward or predictable.
With all the life admin that comes with being a grown-up living the self-employed juggle, it’s not always easy to carve out time and stick to it. Oh, precious time for rest, self-care and creative space.
I long for room to stretch out as an artist and let ideas flow. But even when I have time, sometimes I’m not in the mood. If there are no urgent calls on my time and there’s room to be quiet and reflective or loud and wild, my inner fears and reasons-not-to begin to surface…
I find that little (or louder) internal voices begin to chime in with thoughts and reminders about other things that need doing first. It’s a trap, of course. If I keep listening to the voice which keeps coming up with more possible things to quickly do, be it admin or reaching out to a friend, then I’ll NEVER get round to just being and letting my creativity flow.
There’s also my inner critic. My inner critic suggests that I’ll never get started and what’s the point anyway? They tell me not to trust myself and that I’m not good enough to even try. Not good enough to try? That makes no sense at all really, when you think about it.
At a gig recently, a wonderful artist shared that she had had an extended block where she could not bring herself to sing, not even in the shower. Eventually, she began to break through this block by setting a ten-minute timer – see if anything comes through in ten minutes, just PLAY and let that be enough. I felt a lightbulb go off inside my head and heart and a feeling of warmth and possibility.
Eventually, she began to break through this block by setting a ten minute timer – see if anything comes through in ten minutes, just PLAY and let that be enough.
Ten minutes? Go on then. I can’t argue with that. The pressure is off. Just a slice of time to sit in or hum in or draw or write lyrics in.
Reflective exercise:
Try writing down some of the thoughts which can bubble up and make you want to freeze and not bother. Seeing them on paper, choose to leave those aside and make room for more empowering ones.
